A Cock Up

I really can’t get my head around email spam. I mean, why bother? What’s the point? I can understand why people try to hack into systems, spread computer viruses or engage in a bit of old fashioned fraud. Such people are wankers, but at least there is a reason for such twattishness, be it for financial benefit or mischievous pleasure. But sending out those emails that are full of badly translated gibberish that – even in the unlikely event that they get past the spam-blocker – are instantly deleted by all but the loneliest; what’s that all about?

But the spammers have really messed up this time. I’ve just received an email from my dear old never-known friend alaa Gionet who kindly writes

Hello quinn
want to fit into extra large condoms?

What a waste of time and effort. They’ve really picked on the wrong bloke here. Listen, I don’t mean to boast but I already can fit into extra large condoms; and with plenty of room to spare. I certainly don’t need any info on some bizarre knob diet, that’s for sure.